Did he?

Not quite. Cirrus practically idolizes Chan-il because of how easygoing his character is and an overall happy-go-lucky guy that can get along w/ js about anyone. Cirrus envies how much of a good life Chan-il seems to lead; going as far as assuming he can be liked if he “becomes” like him. Although unlikely, he still continued to live within this façade in order to make friends js as Chan-il does. He emphasizes how much he really loves and cares for Chan-il, and as soon as Chan-il becomes against Cirrus like in the current present, he can’t bring himself to hate nor be angry at him because of how much Chan-il rlly helped him out throughout the toughest parts of his life. Not to mention, he tended to reflect upon Chan-il’s words talking ab his family, and immediately assumes that they were one in the same. Quickly realizing that Chan-il was only burdened/embarrassed by his family, rather than traumatized by like himself. -＊

No but he really admire chan il

His admiration for how Chan Il could get people to like him and generally be a very likeable guy while he may have what was known to Cirrus as family problems, Chan Il really just has a good upbringing (though his parents always see him as their little boy lol).

This later turns to envy because Cirrus imitates what's not coming to him naturally, to blend in with his friends. Being easygoing and flexible.

He sort of twists that intention of Chan It's kindness towards himself as some sort of pity, and it reinforced it into Chan Il has a Saviour Complex where Cirrus presumes that Chan Il just likes to take care of people he seems weaker than him. (When he started befriending Skylar)