I knew it. I had an inkling that, from the start, she already wanted to die. It looks like she really loved First's brother and felt extremely guilty for turning him into a vampire and annihilating his whole family. I don't even think she tried too hard to stay away from First. She kept following him not because she wanted to kill him, but because she wanted him to kill her to lessen her guilt.
I knew it. I had an inkling that, from the start, she already wanted to die. It looks like she really loved First's brother and felt extremely guilty for turning him into a vampire and annihilating his whole family. I don't even think she tried too hard to stay away from First. She kept following him not because she wanted to kill him, but because she wanted him to kill her to lessen her guilt.