Perhaps try reading another genre? You don't have to come back to BL if you don't find joy in it anymore. If you do want to then perhaps try searching for a very specific plot you want to read and ask around to see if anyone can find something like that for you.
What about shonen ai? With no smut scenes
That happened to me but with shoujos xD. I have no idea why. But I eventually got back to reading them after trying different genres. Keep looking around. If you don't feel like reading BL, that's fine! don't force yourself. If one day you find an interesting BL story give reading it a try, who knows you might come to enjoy reading bls again :3
I can imagine that, first boyfriend, oh my goodie! Congratulations, I guess? Haha.
So.....
There will be a period of readjustment dearie. It's just because you're weirded out by the fact that two boys could do it or be together. You just cannot imagine it if that was you ex bf in that kind of situation. It's very understandable, its your first bf after all, a male, and yaoi is all about boys love.
Try something pure first, then milder, to hotter, then move to toxicity. Readjust your mentality.
Maybe you just don't want to see romantic things in general. I didn't want to be reminded of romantic things when I broke up
i was addicted into reading yaoi mangas and manhwas before, its the only thing that i read. But after i got my first bf i couldn't bear myself to read that genre again. it's been a while since we broke up but i cant still bring myself to read even if i force myself into it. what happened? i mean i was addicted before so what happened haha