i’m flabbergasted

i don’t often leave comments but i felt i just needed with this one. i’ve been reading dark bls since i can remember and no reason is so gut-wrenching that killing stalking seems like a total light work in comparison. not only is the seme a total psycho without any remorse or guilt, he also doesn’t care about the bottom at all. he only sees him as his possession and nothing more. hyunjae absolutely ruins do jung-hoon’s life while also blocking out anyone that had or could’ve had any relationship with him. at first i thought it would be just a karma thing since the bottom isn’t so innocent himself but after a few chapters i’ve realized the plot is much more gruesome. the side stories completely broke me since i still had a a lil hope in the back of my mind that maybe even if junghoon didn’t get away from his abuser, they could still have a somewhat decent life after leaving the crime path behind. now i realise that i’ve been delusional and that the hints were always there - junghoon had many chances to turn his life around by simply running away but he chose not to do so. he clinged to the familiarity and that’s what led him to his demise (u can see this pattern with hyunjae but also with the guy who he knew from school). the thing that disturbed me the most is probably the power imbalance, which came from the ml indulging mc in his drug addiction and treating him like an object.
to sum it up: this manhwa is not for the weak, while having a great art style and smut scenes it mostly focuses on the depraved side of the humanity. it’s ok to get off to but u have to be quite detached from it to not impact u or ur mental state. as for today i don’t think i’ll be coming back bcs the story, while interesting, didn’t captivate me enough to torture myself again. if u’d like to read sth similar i’d recommend (not really lol): non zero sum, pufferfish and dolphins-however, those aren’t as developed and i don’t think they’ll stay with me as long as no reason will.