hey i know i’m just a stranger but i’m so relieved you’re still here, reading and commenting. as a fellow south east asian (we’re neighbors!) i feel your frustration and dilemma. i hope things will get better in your country, and i also hope you will always have the strength to keep moving forward. sending love and good lucks to your younger siblings!
Thank you and pats for us South East Asians (I know we all struggle of that same thing). Before, I thought I'd end it after my younger siblings graduated (it's still more than a decade before that happens), but months ago I thought I can't leave yet when I still haven't done my best trying to change things for the better. It was such a far off dream that I think it'll keep me alive and will keep me to move forward till I finally die. So dw...
I am passively suicidal but my dreams are keeping me alive. I once dreamt to be an astronaut but now I'm dreaming of something new.
I want to see my younger siblings to graduate in college, and I want to help to change the world. It's painful enough that I am a Filipino, and I know how many suffers here in the Philippines. I resent our government for making a fool of Filipinos, and I resent my fellow Filipinos for treating the votings for our government as a mere popularity contest. I hate that the bare minimum is a high enough standard for my fellow Filipinos that's why they're not asking for more and I hate that those politicians take advantage of that.
But I can't help but to think that I still want to help my fellow Filipinos regardless. It's a dilemma.