I feel it's less about the toxicity and more about how the toxicity is presented as a healthy/normal or even good thing most of the time? And when it isn't the author is like "Well he had a sad backstory!" like girl no idgaf they are not as healthy now as u like to pretend they are
Like give me an actual romantic toxic story where both mcs are fucking horrid to each other, like try to ruin each other's life and harm each other in every way possible but still being deeply in love with each other even though they and everyone around them knows they ain't good for each other, that's the typa good toxic shit imo
I think they’re complaining because it romanticizes abuse when they put characters in these situations and then give the victims happy endings with their abusers. A lot of people feel like that disregards the victims troubles in the first place and gives some people the idea that abusers are going to change.
I have seen many people complain about the toxicity of manwhas and you know what? I don’t care anymore it’s part of a good story and toxic is normal for any good BL story. Like seriously you’re here reading it yourself.