aaawh girl. I don't know if this helps at all, but a lot of the time intimacy needs as a foundation a love of the self. In my opinion it is not about waiting for someone to accept your flaws, it is about learning to be appreciate of what's great about yourself and being open about your own potential. Learning to think about what "you" want, whether from society, others in your life, or yourself.
The most attractive thing about a person is usually when they find themselves enough and are open to doing their best. I dont mean be confident and optimistic all the time (thats not possible lol), I just mean be okay with the fact that you have shitty parts, learning to be proud of your gifts, and be aware that as a person you will never stop evolving and learning as long as you allow yourself to do so. We all evolve through life in many directions and ways, the most bizarre of us are those that stubbornly stay the same. And I mean, we love imperfect people all the time, a perfect person does not exist. Most of us do not pay nearly as much attention to other people's flaws as we do to our own just out of sheer self-consciousness (and those that do... well I feel sad for those people honestly, they must lead very lonely lives).
We humans are social creatures, we can conceptualize ourselves through having relations with others, so the best thing we can do is be in strong community with each other. I hope you meet wonderful people in your life that make you feel loved and welcome!
I really like this story because it really shows something most bl smut don't talk about. You don't need some big sex trauma to be afraid of sex, many people are insecure about what they are like during sex, what their bodies look like, what kinda faces or sounds they make, their rhythm or their stamina or how well they can understand their partner's body cues. Most ppl end up having a bunch of shitty sex till they get to enjoying it, some never learn to like it much either.
In yaoi it's like everyone's a virgin who has the sexual talents of some highly experienced person, they're a bunch of medical mysteries lol. It's fine cause it's fantasy ofc, but sometimes having a more honest story like this is so refreshing! Also there is something so attractive about having affirming sex with someone more experienced who teaches you the ropes and praises you when you do well ~ I feel like this mangaka actually gets what makes sex fun, her smut scenes are always so meticulous and detailed!