im with u on that but like a woman manhandling another woman is also hot to me i think the issue lies with str8 men just sucking and the implied power imbalance that makes u think of, cause u can see that everyday when you look around. I know what a str8 man would be thinking if he were to throw his "tiny gf" over his shoulder, I know men like that irl ☠
I think If you've read a lot of BL over a long span of time your perspective kinda gets distorted because almost every BL has a abusive seme, so you get used to it. But when the content changes from BL to something else your brain can view it from a different angle and see the flaws more clearly
That's why we read bl to read things that are not possible in straight stories,
I think its hot when an uke is getting man handled by their seme. But if the uke was a woman, i'd think the story was problematic. Im annoyed at the double standards I find within myself. And im annoyed by the fact that yaoi has me thinking this hard...no pun intended XD