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He definitely IS toxic, just not in an irredeemable way. He does what he does because it's hard for him to trust anyone. He's afraid of appearing vulnerable and he feels quite insecure due the intense feelings that mc is forcing out of the walls he has built. But yeah, while i enjoy how flawed he is (since it'll feel more rewarding once mc wins him over) I wouldn't blame mc if he no longer wanted to put up with his calousness.
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I mean, I get what you're saying
I agree that he's flawed and insecure
But I don't consider that toxic, he's not forcing himself on anyone, yunshin is putting up with his behaviour consensually
And also I'd be angry too if I was insecure about being used and I've caught my partner lurking around in my personal space right before he confesses his feelings for me literally sobbing in the middle of the street. And as if that's not enough reason for suspicions, I find out that he has a serious matter that only I can solve and he kept it from me
I'll admit, he should've talked about it with Yunshin instead of throwing a tantrum
But let's be realistic, he's human and he's hurt. It's called defense mechanism. But it's not like he was being violent or abusive or anything
Sorry for the long ass reply lol
So what I'm saying is I agree and disagree with you at the same time, if that makes any sense
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Being toxic is being human a lot of times. It's not only when someone forces themselves on you that it's considered toxicity. Just because Yunshin putting up with him doesn't change anything.A lot of people put up with bad behavior, this doesn't mean though that the behavior of the other person isn't bad. And I'm not speaking about this specific instance where his feelings got 'hurt', there are plenty of scenes where he was a complete asshole. Let me add to that, that someone can be toxic to another human being without necessarily having a relationship with them. Being traumatized explains the behavior, it doesn't automatically make it 'healthy' (not toxic). I can mention various instances when he was very toxic in the story. Is it because of his trust issues stemming from trauma and his overwhelming feelings? Yes.
Does this make his behavior not toxic? No.
Just because i feel irritable for example and i have certain views about people with a personality like you due to my trauma, it doesn't excuse me treating you badly. Yeah, i may be pitiful, but my bad mental state doesn't give me the right to be bad to you, even if you've unknowingly hurt me with your existence. Hope this makes sense.
You can understand and like a character without justifying his behavior by calling it healthy. It's not, by any means. I like him as well, because he's a well written character but I'm not overlooking the fact that he is toxic, I'm just looking at him as a flawed human being, which is what he is.
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Yes I understand, thank you for explaining
Although I have a different opinion, I completely understand and respect what you're saying
I didn't exactly mean that he's "healthy"
He's obviously not
It's just that I think "toxic" is a bit extreme for this character as a whole
I mean we all know people with a couple of bad habits, it doesn't necessarily mean that they are "bad" as a whole
Same goes for Mr. Kang, he has a couple of mini toxic habits but he's not a toxic person in my opinion
He is flawed and he's made a ton of mistakes and he has to make up for them tho
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Oh, but i never said that someone toxic is bad as a whole. People are not just black or white, we all have aspects that are good or bad. Someone can be toxic and still have good aspects which will eventually lead to even healthier behavior. Toxic is a word to describe someone behaving in a unhealthy way towards others, it's not a term that describes someone's whole personality nor is it necessary something permanent. Almost all people have the potential to heal and become a better version of themselves, even if they've been toxic in the past. Humans after all, are complex creatures.
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Hope that makes sense. Toxic is nothing more than a term, it's not an "extreme" way to describe someone's bad aspects. It's a spectrum, you could say. Some people are more toxic than others for example. Someone's actions may not be as bad as another's extremely hurtful actions, but their still toxic nevertheless. What I'm trying to say, is that this term is not used in just extremely bad cases, but in general to describe hurtful behavior towards someone undeserving (and yes, mc was undeserving of ml's hurtful behavior in a lot of cases. Without saying of course that mc is always without fault. He's a flawed character as well)
Oof, you were saying you're the one who writes a lot, but look at the huge paragraphs i created XD
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I suspected we had a misunderstanding over the use of the term because we were technically coming to the same conclusion lol
It's okay, it's hard to explain things in a way that can be understood by other people without writing a whole paragraph so i get it XD
Thank you for the effort as well! It's indeed a fascinating subject.
I'm not blaming Mr. Kang for feeling betrayed and hurt, but I am blaming him for acting snobby and refusing to have a proper conversation
Although I know it's not gonna take long
My boys are good good boys and I've been spoiled
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