I find the pacing and sequence of events a lil weird these few chapters. like what, window breaks then why does ash grab her and run? And wow how convenient theres some house or building for them to go into, then wow convenient conflict bad people immediately find them. like ??? It's like they wanted the first time he finds her to be her crying and holding ash to make it more dramatic or something but I think the sequence of events just come out forced and awkward
I find the pacing and sequence of events a lil weird these few chapters. like what, window breaks then why does ash grab her and run? And wow how convenient theres some house or building for them to go into, then wow convenient conflict bad people immediately find them. like ??? It's like they wanted the first time he finds her to be her crying and holding ash to make it more dramatic or something but I think the sequence of events just come out forced and awkward