I was going to read it but then it was like a full essay
Im sorry I like analyzing stories that i love in order for u not to suffer any longer the tldr is that theres more to joachim's and juergen's relationship (it's messy) and that messiness is currently being masked by all the seggs scenes :") lol
You mean just because Juergen wanted Joachim to give him a reason, he used it as an excuse to force himself on him. If all he wanted was a reason he wouldn't have forced himself on him.
Also it's clear that Juergen is equally as suspicious so he has no excuse, anyways.
Although I can't really say anything about that topic if it's mirroring irl situations, but focusing on the author's intention I thought they made it clear that Joachim was enjoying whatever he and Juergen have going on right now. (At least based on the way the author wrote them.) Like he even said at first that he wasn't angry (which would be his first reaction if he really was forced w the s*x) he was just confused.
And even if Juergen feels suspicious for us readers, we don't really know if he actually *is* suspicious (For now). Besides, we don't know the extent of their relationship yet since we haven't seen Juergen's POV so it's too soon to judge him and his actions. I've only analyzed what's currently presented to me so I don't really have to say anything about that...
That cliffhanger also thank u translator/s for the speedy upload! LMAO at that meme tho so true
Joachim is actually happy to find out Juergen is much serious about their relationship than he had previously thought, and it's not like Juergen is against the idea of breaking up, he just wants to know the truth as to "why" first. I mean, you and your partner should be in this TOGETHER, but Joachim never opened up even when breaking up, I get why Juergen would be a little selfish in this situation.
(Notice that he has trust in Joachim and this relationship that's why he never questioned Joachim even while knowing that he's lying, and considering breaking up as his last straw, he's frustrated Joachim isn't saying anything and is just doing whatever he wants by breaking up. That's why now he's being selfish, because the reason why he wants to break up isn't because he doesn't love him anymore, nor is it because he has another lover, and that's why Juergen refuses to let go. I think in Juergen's perspective, Joachim didn't even consider how he'd feel about breaking up without telling the proper reason, and if Joachim is just going to do whatever he wants, then Juergen thought he'd do whatever he wants as well. Maybe it's immature but love can make u do all sorts of things. However, he said "OTHERWISE i can't let you go" meaning he just wants to hear the REASON from Joachim and which means he's always willing to let go as long as he's given a PROPER reason and not just "Juergen, I'm still in love with you but i need to break up with you. Adios"
But at the same time I understand why Joachim would be reluctant to tell the truth, he doesn't want Juergen involved in whatever shit he's in bcuz he doesn't want him get hurt. (And prior to this, for the yrs that he and Juergen were together he didn't even thought Juergen's serious about him until Juergen showed his possessive side. So he honestly thought he'd be let go easily no strings attached. It never crossed his mind Juergen would care about him to this extent.) Joachim is aware he just needs to tell Juergen that "i might die in my next job, so i'm breaking up with u so i dont hurt u anymore than this" but that's not an easy thing to talk about. Altho he may be being unfair to Juergen, just disappearing like that without telling the truth (in case he dies) but in that situation anyone would be scared, and i think in his perspective "breaking up" is the only thing he can do for Juergen without having to tell the scary truth. I just wanna know how they'd both go about their relationship cuz this is lowkey a mess masked in seggs scenes :")