im kinda ehhh that mizuki keeps pressuring tooru to get nipple piercings. ig im particular...

chachacha June 21, 2021 1:29 pm

im kinda ehhh that mizuki keeps pressuring tooru to get nipple piercings. ig im particularly disappointed bc other than that hes such a nice person.

Responses
    Roy June 21, 2021 2:06 pm

    Pressure? When? There's nothing wrong with Mizuki expressing his desire to pierce Tooru especially since Tooru can read his mind about it anyway. They both speak their mind about what they want and expect from their relationship. Tooru's not some pushover that just says yes, even when he truly doesn't want to. Part of whole Dom/sub thing is that boundaries are being explored and limits are safely being pushed. Mizuki is a good Dom, so we can be certain that when Tooru got his nipples pierced, it was because he wanted them, trusted Mizuki to do them, and because he wanted to satisfy his Dom, which satisfies him (that's the Ds loop).

    chachacha June 21, 2021 5:10 pm
    Pressure? When? There's nothing wrong with Mizuki expressing his desire to pierce Tooru especially since Tooru can read his mind about it anyway. They both speak their mind about what they want and expect from ... Roy

    expressing it once or twice? sure. but hes repeatedly mentioned his desire to have tooru’s nipple pierced, more than twice, and i do consider that a form of pressuring. and unlike tooru, mizuki cant read his mind. he will never know for sure how tooru feels about it, if he is okay with him bringing it up that often, if he considers that a form pressuring. he will never know for sure if tooru ends up getting it bc he constantly mentioned it, or if he truly wants it. thats why he has to tread carefully, bc he wants to be sure tooru definitely wants it. constantly bringing it up would only pressure him.

    as you said, in bdsm relationship limits should be pushed safely /and/ patiently. body modification is not something you can try and see if you like it like spanking. this is why they have to be /particularly/ patient and cautious when they bring this onto the table. its not usually something you bring up to your newbie partner at the beginning of your relationship. ofc, if the person is keen with the idea, thats cool. but tooru was obviously not, and even towards the end of the series, he was still not on board. yet mizuki kept bringing it up. i personally dont consider that exposure, or testing the limit. its just pressuring.

    (and BDSM is not always about pleasing the dom. its only one aspect of it, and sometimes not at all. mizuki is still exploring it.)

    Roy June 21, 2021 8:44 pm
    expressing it once or twice? sure. but hes repeatedly mentioned his desire to have tooru’s nipple pierced, more than twice, and i do consider that a form of pressuring. and unlike tooru, mizuki cant read his ... chachacha

    Youve made fair points, but I think I'll have to agree to disagree on looking at the pressure as something more than a slight annoyance or something that's bad. Again, if Tooru truly had a problem with it, he'd voice it out and make sure Mizuki knew. Being into the lifestyle myself, I do think I'm biased since I'm self inserting as Tooru of being curious, wanting to please my Master, but being afraid of the pain. If their relationship had an imbalance in power dynamics, then I would very much look at the pressure negatively. But because they don't, Mizuki's requests are nothing more than annoying chatter.

    chachacha June 22, 2021 5:05 pm
    Youve made fair points, but I think I'll have to agree to disagree on looking at the pressure as something more than a slight annoyance or something that's bad. Again, if Tooru truly had a problem with it, he'd... Roy

    ditto. im trying to place myself in tooru’s shoes, who at the time hasnt yet fully figured out what he likes and wants from the relationship. so i suppose i expected mizuki to be more careful so he wouldnt come off as “the boyfriend who tells you to look a certain way”, which i feel can be easily interpreted that way, and in fact how i perceived it to be. but yeah, this is just what i think.