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yeah, dw i only tried calling him twice since i'm not really fond of calls either ^^ at that time, i just wanted to hear his voice since i was going through something heavy and just seeking for comfort :(( but i wish he should've just told me if he wanted to end what we had instead of leaving me hanging. well, it's been three years already and it haunts me less now (●'◡'●)ノ
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Oh, I understand maybe I should also give people reason as well. My siblings do tell me I'm horrible because I do that to everyone I talk to if they get too close, I basically run. I would not even go on my messaging apps for weeks just to avoid giving answers to others. Now that I think about it I never thought about how they felt if I did that and I'm just too scared to get close to people.
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ohh but you shouldn't force yourself if it's really taking a toll on you. as someone who also struggles with mental health issues, forcing yourself might do more harm than good! if your social battery runs out, just tell them that you cannot talk right now and take a break (if they still force u to talk, teach them how to respect boundaries). but if you really wish to change, do not rush and go at your own pace ^^ it's fine to run away sometimes since people are indeed scary (and exhausting to deal with)
i relate to Mu so much. i met a guy in a game and within the months of us talking, we never called or videocall each other. every time i tried calling him, he'd say his mic is broken or his phone is malfunctioning. i had an inkling that he's faking his identity but still, i never stopped talking to him and eventually, he ghosted me :)) shitty, ain't it