I’m just like you.Trying to make everyone happy is exhausting. I also wanted my parents attention , I gave up tho. No matter what I did, they never told me how proud they were or “I love you”. Your not alone my friend hope you know that
Darling, remember, you live for you and you alone, do as you please. It’s irresponsible that your family just dumped ur cousins issues onto you. It’s only natural you’d feel as if ur suffocating if they only come to u under circumstances like this. Honestly though, it seems to me that Your contradicting feelings towards your family are eating away at you. Try having a heart to heart moment with urself to really understand what ur feeling and where it’s coming from. Once you understand urself well enough, maybe try talking to ur family about how you feel towards their treatment towards you.
were tired but no one sees it right
they just look at us like everythings okay
let it out here if you still need someone to hear you out im hear for you
thank you for that
it make me felt so warm
i will remember this
U know im just gonna tell u guys how i feel cuz i cant tell anyone about
Im so lonely, i had my dreams, i dream to be a great writer or a manga artist, i dream to go to japan with my only friend but now were apart shes at u.s. now
I feel lonely not because i dont have alots of friends but im lonely cuz i feel like im invisible that no one can see my worth
Only my only friend understand what i feel
My parent and grandparents only love my cousin which is the son of the sister of my mom
He is way better than me, he is smart but he is still childish even tho he is already 20...
He became gay because of his adviser which is really gay and then when i feel like something went off that the way they look to each other is different , i tell my mom and grandma about it but they have a blind spot because of the fake smiles and kindness of the teach
And then when the vacation comes this pandemic
All of the truth came out that they have a secret relationship and they didnt believe me
You know why i tell them, because i dont want my cousin to get hurt because i love him as my brother
And then that gay teach just dump him and play hard to get and still hes crying infront of me and asking why mee!!
If only they believe me, if only they hear me out
And now they are calling me to take all the stress out of him because of the what if he commit suicide
But how about me? Do they even notice me
Do they think what if i die because of stress they throwing me
I wanna die from jumping to a tall building but i have my dreams how ....
How can i stay possitive if they suffocate me ... i cant even forget about my past
They think that im a lil girl who doesnt know anything, a girl that always put smiles on her face but nooo!! All of it is just my mask that i dream
I just pretend just to make you all happy i want everyone not to think about the dark reality... i want you to look at me and see my worth
I want you all to know that im not innocent kid who dont know what trauma is...im a girl with a grown ups thoughts
I hate thinking of having those bad thoughts or getting angry to them cuz i love them so much that if they look at me in the eyes telling me they loved me so much i ....i cant help but not think about getting angry to them ....it touched my heart when they tell me those words and thats my weakness like all of the heroes they all have weaknesses and thats mine