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hello, thank you so much for sharing your experience here! it doesn't matter if it's on a manga website, and it's an inspiring thing to read!
i share the same feelings as you, or maybe similar feelings, if it isn't exactly the same. i don't remember how i got into khr or how i heard about it, but what i remember is this – i was 13, in middle school. the same age as tsuna was when everything first started.
(LONG STORY, SKIP TO THE END IF YOU WANT TLDR! ♡)
my life was dwindling, and i had lost my confidence a few years prior due to an incident. it didn't help that i was often being told and made to feel that i'm worthless and helpless... i became a shell of what i used to be, and my friends – whom i thought were true friends, people who'd be with me through thick and thin, people i could call my family not related by blood – all betrayed me. to me, as a young teenager, i thought i'd lost everything.
when i first watched it, i related to tsuna in a sense that he viewed himself as "cowardly and no-good". that was how i viewed myself back then. as i continued to watch the anime, i somehow subconsciously made reborn as some sort of mentor figure, and i looked up to the other characters as well, making them into my role models of some sort.
i got through middle school and high school because of khr. it gave me courage, strength – i know, to some people, it's just a silly little manga and anime, but it's truly inspiring for me. it gave me the courage to live on, to believe in myself, to face my fears. even when the cycle repeated in college, i pushed myself because i had khr. it gave me hope that things will be better, and that this isn't the end for me. even if i slip and fall, what's important is that i learn and i stand up again. every single decision i make, small or big, can change the future, and i held on to that.
now, it's been more than ten years since i first discovered khr. while there are things i'm not happy about (like where i am right now), i still remain hopeful, and i remind myself that i can still keep going, hoping, and working towards a better and happier future, even if things seem bleak.
(TLDR ♡)
that's a long tangent, but i think what i'm trying to say is this: khr has changed me as a person, changed my perspective on the world, and gave me the strength and courage to live on.
and i'll forever be grateful for that.
TLDR; This manga saved my Life and changed me for the better. ヾ(☆▽☆)
This is a little heavy for a manga website, but I really wanted to leave my story somewhere, where other people who have read this manga are, since this book really means a lot to me.
In 2007 my life was a mess, my home life was poor and miserable which led to me being a cowerdly follower in highschool. Keeping my head down in school and barely living at home, but unfortunately the worst part of my life was starting. I already had a hard time up until this point and suffered with depression but didn't have any friends to help me with it. As the year went on and 2008 started, things around me just got worse and worse I had actually finally given up on living. I stopped going to school I stopped caring about grades and I started planning for my end. I didn't tell anyone and I was getting rid of all my worldly possession, I have never felt that close to following through then at that time. I remember being angry at all the adults around me and the people who supposedly said they cared but not actually asking me how I'm doing. I was so angry wondering why in all the manga and movies NO one was coming to save me. I had waited 12 years at that point and decided that I wasn't worth saving.
Admits all this turmoil I still liked going to the bookstore to read manga since it was my only means of escape. I remember picking up this manga (Katekyo Hitman Reborn) and deciding to buy the first 2 Volumes. I went home and had a fight with my family like always & with what little I had left getting destroyed and getting blamed for it. Being told by your own parent they wish you were never born, hurts no matter how many times you hear it. Waiting for the hell to pass I finally had peace and quiet, I of course was crying on my bed wishing I was dead like I did every day for the last few years.
I will never forget the feeling of not being worth anything b/c no one ever tried to save me or the tiredness of being forced to be alive. I will also never forget crying in bed and deciding to read the books I bought that day.
Vol. 1 ch 5 was the start of something changing in me. When Yamamoto was going to jump and cowerdly Tsuna told Yama that "I never put effort into a single thing" I started to wonder if I ever put real effort into changing my misfortune.
Vol. 2 ch 14; when I read how kyoko's older brother was essentially living his life without regrets, so the bullet didn't affect him had me think about how I have never thought of living life with OUT regret.
By the end of volume 2 after reading Reborn repeating the "dying will" = regret and seeing how Tsuna is changing his surroundings simply by putting effort into having NO regrets ( even with reborns help)
Something in me just clicked.
After that I decided that nobody was going to save me & if I wanted to be saved I need to save myself. And if I had to live then I need to live with no regrets, with my own will power.
It took a couple years to finally get the hang of it but damn am I completely different person than I was. I stopped allowing people to walk all over me I started giving myself priorities and boundaries with people around me. I started standing up for people, even when I am scared I never back down. And anytime I was at my low I told myself I was the only one that can help myself, and I did. I learned that some friends are really there to help you if you just reach out and the only way your life will change is if you yourself want it to change and actually put effort into it.
As the years went by, I continued to buy every single volume that was published in English. Even when English publishing ceased I was happy to have this website to continue reading the story that saved my life. I was 17/18 when I first picked this book up and now, here I am 13 years later.
My life moto for the last 13 years and moving forward is
"If you're stuck living life, make sure 2 live it 2 the Fullest; No Regrets, save yourself first."
Thank you so much Amano Akira